Adachi and Shimamura1,1,2
I did like Hino's way of thinking, how she always tried looking at things
positively. But, would Adachi want to be friends with her? That was a whole
other question.
Knowing Adachi, I could assume that she was the kind of person who
preferred keeping her group of contacts as small as possible. The way I
imagined her, she didn't open herself to others. Now, that was the exact same
thing she had said about me earlier, but I wasn't like that... as far as I knew.
With the one exception of bugs, I loved all sorts of things. Like, staring at
the sky, idly. Or sweet things, those I adored. Seeing Rilakkuma or Mickey
Mouse as well. It simply soothed my heart.
...Huh? Wait, none of those are people. Let's just forget that I said
anything.
"So, talk to me about Adachi."
"Hmm... I wonder how much is okay for me to tell you...? It's not like I
know all that much myself, either."
Take today for example. Or any day off in general. I had no idea what
Adachi was doing to pass the time.
I limited myself to the inoffensive stuff, like what she liked to eat, or
which direction she lived in.
doesn't seem like she's picky about the brand."
Probably because there weren't enough different ones to be picky about.
The vending machines at school only sold Crystal Geyser, so that was
naturally what she drank.
"I see. So, you're saying that Adachi is Namekian?"
"Hard to say, haven't ever seen her grow an arm. Also, she lives..."
As I had no idea what things about herself Adachi might want to stay a
secret, I decided to keep the details scarce. I did wonder how this sort of basic
information might possibly be of any use to her, but Hino didn't seem to mind
and simply nodded back, so I tried not to think about it too much. Maybe she
was going buy Adachi something she liked? Could she be domesticated with
food, like a wild animal?
Come to think of it, I was pretty sure that Hino's stated reason for asking
me to come fish with her had been that there was a weirdo who often came to
the fishing pond, and she wanted me to meet her. The fishing part was meant
to be a "bonus", yet that person was nowhere to be seen. There were some
other people there besides us—an old man and an even older man—but they
seemed pretty normal as far I was concerned. Maybe she just wasn't coming
today? Well, no big deal; it wasn't like I particularly wanted to meet her or
anything. I was perfectly fine just spending the time fishing at my leisure.
At that very moment...
"Are the fish biting?"
I suddenly heard a voice behind me asking how many fish we'd caught.
regaining my grip, I turned around, only to be shocked again. This time, it
was me who almost fell into the water. Thankfully, I managed to stay on my
feet, somehow.
"Huh?" I opened my eyes wide. There was an astronaut standing behind
me. The suit the person was wearing was pure white, and to say that it stuck
out like a sore thumb would've been an understatement.
"Oh, you did come today. That makes bringing Shimamura here
definitely worth it."
Hino didn't seem surprised at all, and instead addressed the astronaut in a
friendly manner. Based on that, it seemed reasonable to assume that this was
the weirdo she had talked about earlier. Come to think of it, hadn't she also
mentioned that the person wore a space suit? Hard to tell; I hadn't been
paying that much attention.
" Khooh, khooh. "
"...Yep, sure is weird."
A girl dressed in a space suit making strange breathing sounds. Pretty
simple, now that I looked at her. As simple as the rod I was holding. Though
the helmet did hide her face, the slightly muffled voice coming from under it
definitely belonged to a girl. The visor dazzled with reflected light like the
surface of water, and I couldn't see through it. She was pretty short, around
the height of an elementary schooler, perhaps. Although, if there really was
an elementary schooler inside that thing, I was kinda worried for her future.
And if it was an adult, well, she was past all hope.
The neck of the suit curled, and her head turned upwards. Though the
outfit definitely gave off the impression that it was tight, her movements
seemed relatively smooth. It probably wasn't as heavy as a real space suit.
"This is the Shimamura."
"What Shimamura...?"
"Hoho! You, huh?"
The space suit girl stared up at me, ignoring how obviously confused I
was. "Space suit girl". That sure was a mouthful. Feeling a little daring, I
decided to try and ask for her name.
"Umm... What's your name?"
It was a pretty simple question, yet I could see her visor shining dimly
with pride.
"Hehehe. Unlike my foolish brethren, I made sure to prepare a name
beforehand."
The girl sounded really proud as she said that. I wasn't sure why, though.
With both of her hands on her hips, she proudly introduced herself.
"Please, call me Yashiro Chikama. Khooh, khooh. "
Yashiro Chikama. A weird name. Although, that "khooh, khooh" was
even weirder. Like us, she was also carrying a fishing rod on her shoulder,
meaning that she was likely here to fish. The old men standing on the
opposite side of the pond did give her a glance, but seeing how they didn't
really seem to care, it could be assumed that they were used to her.
It was kinda surreal seeing her carry the rod and a bucket as well, two
"I have come to Earth to look for my brethren."
"Brethren?"
That wasn't a word I had expected to hear, and it took a moment for my
brain to connect it to its meaning. Still, what did she mean by brethren? Her
buddies?
Wait, did she just say "Earth"?
"A multitude of my brethren were sent to this planet, but none of them
have returned. I reluctantly came to look for them, but got the landing spot
wrong. Khooh, khooh. "
She appeared to breathe audibly after every long sentence. Made sense:
just looking at her helmet made me feel like I was suffocating. Were these
"brethren" of hers dressed like that as well? If so, then finding them would be
pretty quick.
As I was trying to figure out what the heck I was supposed to say next,
Hino gave my shoulder a tap.
"Well then, have fun communicating with the yet unknown."
"Huh?"
"Oh, I can feel a fish over there. That's what my radar's telling me."
Muttering something to that effect to herself, Hino left me. Some part of
me wanted to grab Chikama by the neck and yell at Hino to take her with her.
It was then that it hit me, and I realised why she had brought me with her in
the first place: so that she could force me to keep this kid company in her
stead. I'd been used as a scapegoat.
was a squirming, freshly picked earthworm which she touched completely
calmly, even if her hands were protected by gloves.
"I hear that you're Shimamura."
"Huh? Yeah, that's me. Did Hino tell you?"
I wanted to ask her what else Hino had told her, but I had a suspicion that
I wouldn't get an honest answer even if I tried.
"She told me that you're so popular that all Earthlings frequently visit
you."
"You're thinking of some other Shimamura."
Shaking the fishing rod, I denied her statement. Don't go mixing me with
the other Shimamura.
"Humble, aren't you? Oh, just to make sure that you know, I'm not from
around here. No, I come from the future."
"Haa... Nice to meet you. I come from the past", I quipped back. This
wasn't a weirdo; she was straight up strange. With her brethren around, was
Earth really safe?
"Like a typical Earthling."
"Yep."
" Khooh, khooh. "
"Can't you just take that thing off?"
I advised her to take her helmet off. The self-proclaimed person from the
future simply shook her head, however.
"Please wait a bit longer. My face isn't done yet."
Anpanman's world?"
Hino. Speaking of Hino, she had just pulled in a fish and glanced over to me,
looking extremely proud of herself. It kinda annoyed me how high up in the
air her chin was pointing.
Still, putting her excuses for running away aside, I could really feel the
difference in our skills in the way she moved as she pulled up the fish from
the water. Where I only saw a muddy pond, Hino likely saw something
entirely different.
Looking at her having fun casually fishing, I began to feel like I didn't
belong here.
"So, your friends—or brethren—is it okay for you to not be looking for
them?"
"It is, because I'm hungry."
That almost sounded like something philosophical.
"Since I already made sure that they were safe, I thought I'd just take it
easy."
"Oh, so you have like, a way to contact them?"
She thought for a few moments before answering.
"Well, something like that."
There was definitely a deeper meaning to that. But, first things first.
"If you can contact them, then it feels to me that finding them shouldn't
be an issue."
"Due to the circumstances, that won't work", she answered quickly, after
which she became a little less talkative. Though I was grateful that she was
caused her sudden change in mood. Still, it appeared extremely unlikely that I
could ever get the answer to that question out of her; based on her looks, she
seemed far beyond my comprehension.
With her out of the picture, my only remaining companion was my
fishing rod. And it sure as heck wasn't going to say anything. Slowly but
surely, I was starting to feel bored.
"The fish sure aren't biting, huh?"
"Those kinds of thoughts are an important first step."
"Huh?"
"Fish aren't biting, things aren't going well. Thoughts like those mean that
you're starting something."
As she said this, Chikama lifted up her fishing rod. The line cut through
the surface of the water, but, as it turned out, she hadn't caught anything.
With her moment to show off ruined, she cast her hook back into the pond.
Had she simply tried out her luck?
At the same time, the straw hat fellow on the other side of the pond yelled
that she had caught another one.
"Afterwards, you simply cast your line while hoping for a good future",
Chikama stated optimistically. With her stomach growling, she continued to
stare at her fishing line.
Taken in isolation from her earlier crazy statements, she had a good point
there. What she had said was also true of other things in life, wasn't it?
The first thing that came to mind was the second floor of the gym. Its hot
"..."
Sometimes, for things to start, you needed to take the first step and try
speaking out.
"And that's what happened."
"Hmph."
The story of Sunday didn't seem to particularly interest Adachi of
Monday, and she simply nodded along as I recited it to her.
How dry. It was like I was randomly sweeping around dead leaves.
"You didn't really care, huh?"
Just so you know, Chikama had caught five (or maybe six) fish before
leaving. I wondered if she had eaten them.
"Huh? No, I did care. ...I wish you'd stop asking questions like that."
"Sorry, sorry."
The day was Monday, and it was currently the lunch break. As usual, I
was passing the time with Adachi on the second floor of the gym. Hino and
Nagafuji hadn't made an appearance, and I bet Adachi preferred it that way. It
was also better for me, since it meant that I didn't need to worry about her
feelings.
Hanging around with Hino and Nagafuji and being with Adachi was like
water and oil. They didn't mix. That's how it felt to me.
Which one of us caused that, me or Adachi? Let's just leave that aside.
Adachi was lying on the floor, using my extended legs as a pillow.
she was really tired as a result. I was a little shocked to hear that; I had no
idea she had a part-time job.
Still, I knew she must have been doing something on her days off.
"Where do you work, Adachi?"
"Not telling you."
Having turned to lie on her side, she rejected my question. Her cheek
touched my lap and felt cool.
"Why?"
"I get the feeling that you'll come see me if I tell you."
"Well, yeah, that was the plan."
"And that's why I'm not telling you. Too embarrassing."
Adachi hung her head, causing her bangs to fall onto her face and hide
most of it under them. I placed my hand on her hair and slowly stroked it
with my palm. It tickled me a little, but also felt good.
"There's no need to be embarrassed. I'm really impressed that you have a
job. Well done, well done."
I patted her head as a joke, like you'd do when praising a child. I had a
feeling that this might make her mad, but surprisingly enough, she didn't say
a word. Maybe she really was tired, and reacting was too much work? Adachi
had taken off her jacket and tossed it onto the ping-pong table. Her shoes also
lay on the floor. Looking at her, there was only a single word that came to
mind: freedom.
Still lying on my lap, Adachi turned over to face me. Her face landed on
a few moments, she stayed like that, silently staring at my abdomen. I wasn't
sure if it was her way of alleviating drowsiness or what, but she was blinking
pretty rapidly.
Adachi's nose twitched slightly. After that, her lips relaxed.
"I think I like lying this way better."
"You do?"
Considering that she could hardly see anything, it seemed to me that it'd
just make her feel awfully confined.
Adachi lifted her face slightly, almost as if she was proud of something.
"Yeah, because if I lie this way, I can smell you."
"Huh? Is my body odour that strong?"
No one had ever commented on my scent before, and if I really did smell,
I'd be absolutely devastated.
"That's not what I meant... Okay then, I won't do it."
What do you mean, "okay then"? Don't make this about me. Following
her comment, Adachi pouted her lips, and her face turned into a slight frown.
I wasn't sure why.
"I think you might lack elegance, Shimamura."
"Elegance? Hmm, elegance... That's also something no one has ever said
about me."
"Elegance". That wasn't a word I often got a chance to use, seeing how
where I lived—the countryside—was completely devoid of it.
Around twenty minutes had passed since the beginning of lunch break.
was hard for me to move and go buy us some. Still, Adachi relaxing her
guard this much around me was quite the rare occurrence, and I simply
couldn't bring myself to roll her off.
Though I had just looked at it moments earlier, I checked the clock again.
The break would soon end. We'd clean up, and then... Watching the hands of
the clock go around, my mind wandered off into the near future.
"Hey, Adachi."
"Mmh?" she responded with what sounded like a purr, still lying on my
lap. Stroking her hair, I tried asking her the following.
"What would you say about sitting through the afternoon classes with
me?"
Adachi lifted her head. She placed her arms on the floor and pushed
herself up. Fiddling with her hair, she cautiously looked me in the eyes.
"Where is this coming from?"
"Well, I was just thinking about how many days of school there are left. I
guess what I'm trying to say is, I'd prefer it if neither of us got held back."
I didn't know if we would be placed in the same class, but even if we
weren't, that would easily be less awkward than having Adachi be one grade
below me.
Then again, I hadn't actually counted the days or anything, so it might
already have been too late.
I'd been thinking about suggesting this to her for a while now. The order
of things here—skipping class, meeting Adachi, and then proposing
being a real possibility that she might have to repeat a year, I couldn't just sit
back and watch.
I wasn't paying for school with my own money, heavens no. As such, I
could easily see my parents kicking me out of the house if I ever had to
repeat a year or something. Though they were hands-off most of the times,
that only made them stricter when it counted.
"Hmm, well..."
Scratching her cheek, Adachi turned her head and looked around the
second floor.
Having taken in the atmosphere and scenery, she once again rested her
head on my lap.
Had she taken a liking to it?
"I guess it won't hurt doing it every once in a while."
Her statement wasn't all that persuasive considering that she was still
lying down, but it also wasn't a refusal. She had said "every once in a while",
which meant that there was a possibility that she would choose not to come
tomorrow, but even so, for some reason, my heart was filled with relief.
It felt like I had managed to ventilate the stuffy air in the gym just a little
bit.
"Let's go somewhere once school's over", Adachi said, having lifted her
head. Her voice was much clearer now that she was actually talking while
facing me.
"Do you have any plans? Are you going somewhere with someone?"
"I see, I see."
As if relieved by my answer, Adachi lowered her head back on my lap.
My legs were starting to get a little numb, but who cared?
Still, going somewhere with Adachi was quite the rare occurrence. Most
of the time she left before school ended.
"Well then, how about we go check out the place where you work?"
"I told you already, I don't want to..." she grumbled in response, and
turned over on my lap. She was like a little child, embarrassed that their
parent was coming to visit their classroom to see how they were doing. At the
same time, I could understand how she felt; I would probably have been
embarrassed too if I was in her position. School was functionally its own
world, so having its atmosphere be forced on you outside of it was bound to
leave you perplexed.
This was also why there were those who wished that they could live their
whole life in school.
Let's just leave that topic aside.
I wanted to catch a good future. And for that to happen, the first step was
to start fishing.
Obviously not inspired by the fishing enthusiast from the future or
anything silly like that, I went ahead and cast my line towards Adachi.
"The catches today were pretty good, huh?"
Watching Adachi lie on my lap, not making any attempt to move, I was
reminded more of a dog than a fish.
We received some stares from our fellow students as we entered the
classroom. Which one had surprised them: the fact that Adachi had come to
class, or that I was with her. Probably a mix of the two. We were both treated
as delinquents, after all.
Yawning, Adachi looked around the classroom. Had she perhaps
forgotten where her seat was? Adachi sat in the front row on the corridor
side, whereas I sat in the third row next to the windows. They were on the
exact opposite sides of the classroom, and so, we parted ways immediately
after entering as we went to take our seats. Having sat down, I started
preparing for the upcoming class. Wait, did Adachi even have the textbook
with her? Thinking this, I glanced at her, only to see that she had already
taken it out.
From the looks of it, she kept them all stored in her desk. Adachi had
placed the book--and nothing else—on the table. Next to it rested her elbow,
propping up her chin. Keeping that pose, she turned her gaze towards the
windows, most likely to look at me. Her glance came too suddenly for me to
dodge, and our eyes met. I was a little startled, and, by the look of it, so was
Adachi.
We sat there, staring at each other. It was difficult to look away. Using
our eyes, we asked each other "What do you want?" at least ten times. That's
what it felt like, anyway. Being the one who had looked first, it made sense
that I should answer that question. Still, how exactly was I meant to convey
classroom.
I decided to try pointing at my own textbook. Would this be enough for
her to understand the meaning of my stare? Adachi turned her eyes down
towards the book sitting on her desk and stared at it for a while. Still looking
at her, a thought crossed my mind: her profile really was like a painting.
Having lifted her head back up, Adachi mouthed me a reply. I couldn't
understand it at first, but after she repeated the message for a second time, I
finally realised what she was saying:
"Did you forget your book?"
Hey, don't lump me with you. I might not have been the best student, but
that was simply crossing the line. Of course, since in the eyes of Adachi—
and everyone else for that matter—I was simply a delinquent, the source for
such unnecessary worries lay completely within myself.
Meanwhile, the teacher arrived. Though she did look curiously at the two
of us, clearly surprised by our presence, she didn't say anything about it, and
simply walked over to her desk in silence.
The class then began. How long had it been since we last sat in a
classroom together? Adachi had definitely been around more during the first
semester, but back then, I hadn't been paying any attention to her. Still,
looking back to it with the knowledge I now possessed, there had definitely
been something strange about her.
Knowing that we'd end up in another awkward situation if our eyes were
to meet, I did my best not to look into Adachi's direction. This actually led
teacher was writing on the blackboard.
My eyes and hand moved automatically, and my idle mind continued
piling up endless questions in an attempt to fight back against boredom.
Which one of us was making it so that the gap between us couldn't be
closed, me or Adachi?
With my head filled with thoughts like those, I copied what it said on the
blackboard in my notebook like a robot.
"So, what did you think of your first class in like forever?"
"I'm fine with Japanese history, but maths? I don't got a clue anymore."
"Hahaha. Oh Adachi."
I must've taken far more classes than Adachi. So then, why was I in the
same boat as her when it came to maths?
Well, simple: I was more suited for the liberal arts. Japanese? Fluent.
After school ended, I left with Adachi as I had promised to do. Once
again, there wasn't much in her bag.
"Shimamura, did you notice that everyone was staring at you?" Adachi
said, looking over her shoulder at the classroom we had just exited.
I hadn't really noticed, but it definitely sounded plausible.
"You don't think it was you who they were staring at?"
"Nope. Definitely you," she asserted. And how did she know that?
"Must be because you're so pretty."
Huh? Where had that come from? I was so taken aback by Adachi's
nearly bonked my head into the wall. In panic, I took a step back to avoid the
collision, this time coming close to falling on my butt.
"What's wrong with you?", Adachi asked, tilting her head with her foot
firmly planted on the first step of the stairs. Come on, you know that was
your fault.
"Sorry. It's just, no one has ever called me pretty before."
"Beautiful", on the other hand, I had heard from my relatives as a
compliment.
"Really? ...You don't have a boyfriend or anything?"
"Nope, never had one."
"Hmm..."
Judging by her reaction, something about my response bothered Adachi.
Her face was blank, but pointed slightly upwards.
"All the guys must be blind then."
Really? I would've thought it was the opposite. Still, I felt flattered, and
decided not to say that out loud.
"By the way, where are we going?"
"I'm kinda hungry since we didn't have any lunch."
"Alright. So, somewhere to eat then?"
Adachi rubbed her belly through her uniform. Then, after taking a quick
look around, she replied.
"I'm in the mood for something simple. Like, doughnuts."
"Doughnuts, huh? Well, the station's close by. Let's go there."
walk to the station, but I wasn't opposed to it.
We walked silently side by side. It was when I reached the school gate
and Adachi was still with me that I noticed that something was off.
"Huh? Where's your bike?"
"I didn't come to school with it today. It's being repaired."
Though Adachi tried to play it cool, I knew that she lived quite far away
from school.
"Really? Even though she had to walk, the delinquent came to school?
Well done", I praised her jokingly. As I did, Adachi stared at me, looking
completely serious. She pulled her shoulders together, as if her entire body
had stiffened up, and opened her mouth.
"...I thought you might come", she muttered. Or rather, spoke firmly.
"O-Okay", I answered back, awkwardly.
What she had said wasn't all that different from straight up confessing
that she came to school just to see me. And she had said it straight to my face.
Having perhaps realised this herself due to my reaction, a faint blush
appeared on Adachi's face. Or maybe it only seemed like that to me. Either
way, something about this atmosphere felt rough against my skin.
What was that something?
Maintaining that feeling of stiffness—different from awkwardness—we
drifted towards the station. We entered the cheap-looking, two-storied
building swarmed by countless people—some of them wearing school
uniforms—and then the Mister Donut located directly to the left of its
having returned from school by train—as well as other customers of course—
leaving us nowhere to sit. Furthermore, the line to the register was absurdly
long.
"This place is pretty popular, huh?" I asked Adachi, and gave her a glance
over my shoulder. As I did, I at last saw her laugh.
"Still, I like this smell of sugar", she said, sniffing the sweet aroma that
filled the store. So sweet, in fact, that just smelling it made me feel full.
"Like insects gather around flowers."
"Hmm, I don't really like that example."
Adachi frowned at my comparison. It seemed that she wasn't a fan of
bugs. Knew it.
A part of me felt relieved that we had finally spoken to each other after all
the time spent in silence.
"What do you want to eat, Shimamura?"
The usual atmosphere was back, and so was the liveliness of Adachi's
voice and movements. Walking here together had been like two stone statues
trying their hardest to move, and so, her acting like that was, in a way, fresh.
"I'm always bad at choosing, but I think I'll go with Angel French. Oh,
and I'll buy two more to give to my little sister when I get home."
Though I never knew what to pick, a lot of the time I ended up going with
this one. As it turned out, it was also the kind of doughnut Mom used to buy
me when I was little, so perhaps there was some sort of psychological
imprinting at play here.
had been planning to buy an Angel French as well.
"Hmm? What's troubling you?"
"That we're gonna pick the same thing."
"And? Is there a problem with that?"
"Hmm... I think I'll go with this after all."
Adachi chose the Honey Dip from the row below. Did she perhaps dislike
matching with others?
Standing in line, Adachi spoke to me, holding the tray that carried our
doughnuts.
"Are you going to class tomorrow too?"
"I was planning to. Don't want to be known as someone who gives up
immediately."
"I see."
It wasn't like I didn't miss the second floor of the gym. Besides, we'd
definitely hang around there again.
Smiling at Adachi's blunt response, I looked at her and spoke.
"Would you, Adachi, not join me?"
I purposefully made my tone sound theatrical. Adachi was taken aback
slightly, but after a few seconds, she replied with a smile.
"Well, okay. Just a little bit more."
Surprisingly enough, she didn't have any objections towards going to
class.
It wasn't like either of us had any particular reason to skip class. As such,
naturally.
After waiting for what felt like an eternity, we finally paid for our
purchases and exited the store. Then, leaning against the side of a nearby
escalator, we began eating. Adachi opened the bag and handed me my Angel
French using a paper napkin to pick it up. I thanked her, accepted it, and sank
my teeth into the chocolate part.
"Sweet."
Having not eaten anything since breakfast, the sensation I felt as the
sweet chocolate touched my tongue was quite intense. My lips contracted, but
in a unique way, not quite like when eating something sour. Still, the taste
was delicious. Heavenly sweetness wrapped my tongue and teeth.
Adachi, on the other hand, tore off a small piece of her doughnut and
placed it in her mouth. She was eating it like bread. However, while doing it
that way might look more elegant, it also covered your fingers in sticky
sugar, which was why I preferred biting in directly. Still, doing that caused
the area around your mouth to get dirty, so in the end, I suppose there wasn't
really a difference between the two.
"By the way, Hino was asking about you yesterday."
While eating, I suddenly remembered that I had forgotten to tell her that.
Adachi's hands stopped, and she looked away from me.
"Is Hino the small one?"
"Yep, you got it. She said she wanted to get on good terms with you."
"Oh, okay."
Adachi still wouldn't look at me, and simply mumbled something in
response. It was like talking to a wall. If Hino really wanted to get along with
her, she was in for a challenge.
I had to wonder though, how was I on such good terms with her?
As one's own personality was something beyond one's grasp, I had no
idea what about me had caught her interest.
"Anyway. Shimamura, you have a little sister? You mentioned her a little
while ago."
Adachi quickly moved the topic away from Hino. Not that I really cared.
"Yep, I do."
"How old?"
"Fourth grade. My folks treat her like she's still in kindergarten, though."
Speaking about Mom, her behaviour seemed to change completely
depending upon if she was at home or outside of it. I'd heard that she used to
be a straight-A student back in school, and yet, despite having long since
become an adult, she still threw special martial arts moves against her older
sister whenever she came over to visit.
The way she altered her behaviour kinda resembled Adachi, didn't it?
"A little Shimamura, huh? I bet she's cute."
"When she's not being a cheeky brat or kicking me", I answered in a
slightly ambiguous way.
"Must be nice", Adachi replied, smiling.
Was she perhaps yearning for a sibling? I guess that would make her an
I wasn't sure if it was related to that or not, but either way, Adachi held
out a torn-off piece of her doughnut.
"Wanna try it?"
"Sure."
I extended my head towards the piece of dough she held in her fingers
and took a bite. The sweet taste coated with honey quickly filled my mouth.
So sweet, in fact, that I felt like my teeth were going to start aching. Honey
really did have its own, uniquely thick sweetness that cream just couldn't
match.
"You can taste mine too."
I held out my doughnut in turn, ignoring the fact that it was half-eaten.
Adachi stared at it intensely, but refused to move her head. Wondering why
she was hesitating, I glanced at the doughnut. I then realised what was wrong.
"Oh, I see."
I pulled the doughnut back and took a small bite of it. With the cream
filling now exposed, I once more presented it to her.
"Like this?"
"...Okay, like that."
Adachi took a bite of my Angel French, leaving me to wonder what she
had meant by that strange expression. She chewed thoroughly and then
swallowed. In spite of how loosely she was wearing her uniform, her modest
and deliberate movements gave the impression of politeness.
Watching her eat, I imagined that her parents must have been quite strict
"Where are we going after eating?" Adachi asked, wiping sugar stains off
her mouth. This station had many establishments meant for salarymen
coming from work who wanted to drink, but few for us. There were grocery
stores, bakeries, and even a MOS Burger on the first floor; all places that sold
food.
Well, there was a Matsukiyo deeper in, but I didn't have any specific
interest going there.
"I don't really see this station often."
"It's way different from Nagoya, that's for sure."
"Still, Nagoya's a pain. Too many people. This is just the right amount for
me", Adachi said, laughing. Agreeing with the first half of her statement, I
tossed what was left of my doughnut into my mouth.
As I now had to wait until Adachi was done eating, I quickly spaced out.
Back when I was in elementary school, it had been written on my report card
that I was an absent minded child. I hadn't changed much in that aspect, and
even these days, it didn't take long for my mind to wander off whenever I had
free time.
I let my senses take over and lazily extended my limbs, without any
particular preference where they landed. I really liked moments like these,
just relaxing and letting myself sink into the world of imagination.
A possible implication of this was that I preferred being alone.
Being with someone else meant not being allowed to point your senses
inwards.
Adachi wiped her hands and stood up. I was a little jealous of how light
her bag seemed.
"Okay. So, umm... Shall we go?"
We began walking with our destination still unknown. Our legs moved on
their own, guiding us towards the station's entrance.
Had I been by myself, I likely would've spaced out, wandered around
aimlessly, and then gone home as my feet got tired. However, Adachi was
with me now. Not wanting to offend her, I forced my brain to stay active. A
pretty rare occurrence, me working this much.
In a way, pain and being a human went hand in hand.
Things that you couldn't comprehend, things that were tedious, the effort
it took to mend and demolish all the complexities that arose with
relationships.
And yet, in the crevices of all those negative aspects, there lay scattered
bits of happiness.
Like accidentally finding a small ball you'd lost when you were a child.
A better future. That's what I wanted to believe that meeting Adachi had
been.
With thoughts like those flowing through my mind, we exited the station.
Then, after a few steps...
Squeeze
"..."
I tried to speak, but I was far too astonished, and no sound came out of
Adachi, standing beside me, had grasped my hand.
Having not anticipated it in the slightest, I froze in my tracks and turned
around to look at her. Our eyes met, and I could see Adachi anxiously trying
to gauge my reaction. She then looked away.
Had Adachi, for instance, noticed that I was about to wander on the road
and grabbed my hand to stop me at the last second? It didn't seem like that
was that case.
"Oh, if you don't want to, I'll let go. I'll let go right away", she spoke rapidly, almost as if in a panic. I couldn't help but get a little flustered too,
and my eyes moved away from her.
I looked at the station, the fence next to it, then a sign telling that the
flying junction was under construction.
"No, it's fine. I was just surprised."
I had thought that she'd been a pickpocket who had accidentally grabbed
my hand instead of my bag.
That, or a pushy guy trying to pick me up.
Anyway, it made me feel relieved knowing that a random stranger hadn't
just taken my hand. And yet, I hesitated asking Adachi why she had done so.
No matter how you looked at it, holding hands was excessively close. I
could feel my legs getting shaky.
It was pretty strange how I had been more okay with her using my lap as
a pillow, but I digress.
"Should I stop?"
"No, it's fine. Let's keep moving."
I couldn't bring myself to shake her off. Sometimes even I took other
people's feelings into consideration.
I gripped Adachi's hand back and began walking. Feeling extremely self-
conscious, I purposefully puffed out my chest and extended my back.
I knew that if I didn't force myself to do so, I would've ended up cowering
like a cat, trying to hide from the gazes of those around us.
Though Adachi's lack of warning had definitely caught me off-guard,
but outside of it I had definitely seen girls walk around hand in hand, or arm
in arm. Of course, seeing others do it was one thing; now doing it myself, I
felt pretty weird.
Not that I'd even had the opportunity to hold someone's hand since the
sports day in elementary school.
Adachi's hand was very soft, which also made it a bit difficult to relax.
"You're surprisingly affectionate, Adachi."
"I'm... not."
Her reply sounded strangely assertive. It seemed that even Adachi wasn't
all that confident in herself.
Staring at the road, she squeezed my hand tight. It felt so awkward having
her behave this way.
"Definitely is surprising", I restated, showing just how strange the
situation I found myself in was.
This wasn't at all the kind of future I'd been thinking about while eating
that doughnut.
"It's not really... surprising to me, though..."
Well, obviously. Adachi had been the one to grab my hand, after all. It
would've been a real mystery if even she herself had found it strange.
As we continued walking, I found myself unable to focus on anything
other than the fact that we were holding hands.
Was this just how Adachi lived her life, always holding someone's hand?
We had never walked together before this, so maybe she just hadn't had a
Was that it? There definitely were people like that out there, who'd do
that because they wanted to feel the touch of another person.
Or maybe Adachi was actually into girls? No, probably not. Probably.
Probably. For some reason, I was unable to look at her face and could
only stare forwards, but regardless.
Still, what would I do if that happened, if Adachi said that she loved me?
...Really, what would I do?
"Where are we going, Shimamura?"
"Huh? I don't know. Do you have anywhere you want to go, Adachi?"
"I'm fine with going wherever you want to go."
This was quite the difficult situation. As we were both the kind of people
who lacked the will to choose for themselves, we ended up pushing the
responsibility onto each other.
As Adachi seemed like the more mature one of us, I wanted her to solve
this. We were like a pair of lost children, wandering around somewhere
unfamiliar. Where was the doggy cop to take us home?
Adachi's finger twitched. More precisely, I felt a slight pulse coming from
her fingertips, travelling through the part of my skin where they touched.
Conscious of that pulse, I moved my finger, earning a reaction from her. It
then vanished, as if hiding itself.
It was like fishing. Slightly cautiously, we both tried to touch each other,
all to get a glimpse of something.
What about me did Adachi want to see?
wasn't particularly hiding anything.
Other things, like the townscape around us, no longer mattered to me. As
my brain was pretty much full even at the best of times, I felt it might fry
from an information overload if I didn't shut off some of my senses for now.
The last thing I wanted to have happen was to lose my composure and start
yelling out loud.
Where were we going? Shopping hand in hand? Yeah, definitely not that.
Should I just drag her all the way to my house, like pulling a fish onto
land?
Just as I was about to make that suggestion...
" Khooh, khooh. "
"Whoa!?"
I heard a certain cry (was that the word?) coming from behind me, one
that I'd grown very used to hearing the previous day. I turned around, and
Adachi did too.
Just as I had expected, the spacesuit from yesterday was standing behind
me. The height was the same, meaning that the person inside was likely the
same as well. Though the city might have been small from a global
perspective, it definitely wasn't when you actually walked around. As such, it
was pretty crazy to think that we'd just happened to run across each other
immediately the day after our first encounter.
The suit's blue visor shone dimly, and as it shook, it seemed like it was
filled with stars made of water, moving all around.
"Oh, hello."
She bowed her head politely, and I quickly did the same.
"I saw you, so I thought I'd call out to you. Khooh, khooh. "
"Was that your 'call'?"
Talking while bewildered really wasn't good for my stomach. Also, I had
just realised, but at some point, Adachi had pulled her hand away. Now
holding her arm tight against herself, she stood a small distance away from
me.
Did that slight bit of red I saw on her nose indicate that she was blushing?
Despite all the time I had spent walking around town with her, I still
didn't really understand what was going through Adachi's mind.
"Is that how you usually dress when you go out?"
"Well, these are my best clothes."
Perhaps her only ones.
It seemed like talking with her was drawing attention to me from the
people around us. Not that I really cared.
I wasn't sure if it was due to the earlier hand-holding and trying to hide
my embarrassment or what, but I felt strangely active.
I attempted to place my hand on her helmet, causing Chikama to panic
and hastily retreat. She kept her distance from me as I wiggled my fingers,
but the moment I retracted my hand, she hopped back to me. That strong
opposition to having her helmet removed made me want to take it off even
more.
her face close to my fingers. Or more accurately, her visor.
"Your fingers smell wonderfully sweet."
Though I couldn't tell if she was actually smelling them or what, she did
rub her visor all over my fingers. I was reminded of an insect lured in by the
nectar of a flower. While I definitely preferred her to an insect, I still found
the fact that she could smell anything through that thing on her head a little
curious. What would I do if the person inside was a dog-human?
My face reflected off the visor. With a slight change of angle, Adachi too
showed up in the corner.
Looking at her expression, it kinda seemed like she wasn't amused.
"Lovely. What scent is this?"
"Doughnuts, maybe? I ate one a little while back."
"Dough-nut?" Yashiro asked, tilting her head. With her head still tilted,
she turned her helmet towards the paper bag I was holding. I had a really bad
feeling about that, and began pulling it back. As I did, however, Yashiro's
hands moved, matching the movements of the bag. She'd likely leap towards
it any second now if I were to ignore her.
"So, what exactly are you doing?"
"My radar reacted. You have dough-nuts in there."
"I do, but we aren't at the fishing pond. Don't take them."
Come to think of it, you had to pay to enter the pond. Did that mean that
she had money?
Yashiro lifted a single finger.
secrets in return."
"Is there a sale on space secrets or something? Because that doesn't sound
like a fair deal."
Though at first I was very much against the idea of giving her my
doughnuts, I soon realised it: eating something would likely mean that she'd
take her helmet off. I'd get to see her face.
Seeing how I had been curious about it ever since yesterday, this was the
perfect bait to lure me in.
"...Well, whatever. But just one."
"Wow!"
It was hard to tell if that was an exclamation of enthusiasm or not. Her
pose, with both of her hands raised high, seemed strangely apathetic.
My little sister would probably be satisfied with just a single one, right?
Besides, if I bought her too many snacks, she'd lose her appetite for dinner
and Mom would get mad at me. After a few moments of pondering which to
spare, I handed Yashiro the custard cream one.
"Is this a dough-nut? Oooohh."
Again, did that voice indicate that she was impressed or not? Either way,
it was very characteristic of her, though I couldn't help but be reminded of the
cry of an animal.
I eagerly waited for Yashiro to remove her helmet, only to be massively
disappointed: she barely opened it at all. The doughnut slipped through the
slight crack, and the sound of munching soon ensued. I felt horribly
Just what was this girl?
"These are good. Sweet, sweet!"
Yashiro, on the other hand, was clearly delighted. Her entire body shook
from joy.
"Not knowing what a doughnut is goes beyond just being a weirdo."
Not that I minded seeing her happy, of course.
"Would you happen to have any more sweet things?"
I could feel a demanding glare coming from inside the helmet. With my
hands on my hips, I refused her.
"Go buy them yourself."
"I don't have money."
She seemed strangely proud about that.
"How the heck do you live the—"
"Shimamura."
My name was suddenly called, and I jumped a little.
Mostly due to how stiff the voice responsible sounded.
Adachi placed her bag back on her shoulder and pointed her eyes towards
the opposite side of the road.
"I'll go get my bike, so..."
"Huh?"
Wait, I thought she didn't come to school by bike today? I felt so
confused.
Thinking about it calmly, she probably meant picking it up from the
"Anyway, I'm going now. See you tomorrow."
Waving her hand slightly, Adachi turned around and left by herself. I
tried yelling back to her, but she only gave me a glance over her shoulder and
waved at me again.
Just moments ago, she'd been asking me where we were going next. What
a sudden change of heart.
"...Could it be that she got mad?"
Was she perhaps sulking because I ignored her? No, that seemed
impossible. It was something else, for sure.
Maybe she was so embarrassed that she couldn't stand still? Which one?
Or maybe neither? As usual, I simply couldn't make head nor tail of Adachi.
As I hesitated over whether or not I should run after her, Yashiro spoke,
still munching the doughnut.
"Instead of giving you a piece of space secrets, should I explain what just
happened?"
"...Speak."
"She got mad because you didn't give her a dough-nut."
"Go home."
I shooed her off. Luring her in with doughnut as the bait had just made
things even more confusing.
Knowing Adachi, she wouldn't even mention this tomorrow, but still.
I placed my hand on my forehead and sighed deeply.
"Dealing with people sure is hard, huh? A real pain."
"What do you know?"
And thus, like a calamity affecting a city, the number of weirdos grew by
one.
Going forward, this self-proclaimed person from the future would change
my life in a great way. Maybe. I didn't know.
The concept of change didn't exist in the first place when talking about
human lives.
As no one knew the future, changing it was beyond anyone's ability.
For a while after I woke up, I just sat there in my bed. All sorts of
thoughts flew through my mind as I ruffled my hair, filled with self-hatred.
Grumbling quietly, my head filled with excuses.
I wasn't like that, I wasn't. I bet Shimamura wasn't either. As such, having
such a dream about her was completely inexcusable. If she knew, she'd likely
start avoiding me, keeping her distance. I had to stay silent, no matter what.
I hadn't felt the touch of her lips. Obviously not; I had never touched
them, and didn't know what they felt like. And yet, the softness of her fingers
from earlier was still fresh in my mind. The vividness of that memory made
me feel uncomfortable, as if I had just peered into the subconscious wishes
which dwelt inside me. My heart wouldn't calm down.
We had been in Shimamura's room (where I'd never been) watching TV
together. She had sat against the wall, and I had sat between her legs, leaning
against her. Smiling gently, in a way I had never seen her smile before,
Shimamura looked only at me, and then, brought her face closer. I turned my
head to look at her, and she... Every little thing I remembered caused me to
become ever more flustered. Cold sweat covered my body.
A dream like that probably just indicated that I wanted to become slightly
better friends with her, right? Wanting to be special to her in some small way,
closer than her other friends. Like, for example, while other people called her
to be fair, calling her anything other than "Shimamura" at this point would
probably just make both of us feel uncomfortable. Furthermore, no matter
how hard I tried, I couldn't recall her first name.
Most likely, Shimamura would always be "Shimamura" to me.
For an unknown reason, something about that made me feel relaxed. It
was like a bit of tension had suddenly been released. I liked it.
And there you have it. I wasn't like that. There was no deeper meaning to
the kiss.
"...There's not."
I couldn't completely deny wanting to do it. At the same time, I wasn't
sure if I did want it.
Imagine this situation for an example: sleeping Shimamura, no people
around in a 5 kilometre radius, and an omnipotent god telling me that she
wouldn't wake up for the next 24 hours no matter what happened. By the 23-
hour mark, I'd probably be so bored that I might go ahead and try doing it
once.
What I'm trying to say is, that's how not interested I was. Yes, not
interested.
"Wait, do the circumstances even matter, or is it just always weird to
think about wanting to try it? Hmm..."
If Shimamura, on the other hand, said that she wanted to kiss me, I
probably wouldn't say no.
I might be a little taken aback and confused, but I don't think I would be
Yes, that definitely was weird.
I could worry about it all I wanted, but it'd never help me carry that
weight.
Again, to repeat, I wasn't like that.
I just wanted Shimamura to think about me more than her other friends.
That's all.
When she heard the word "friend", I wanted to be the first person who
came to her mind.
And yes, I understood how selfish that was.
In truth, ever since I met Shimamura, I'd been wondering just how close a
friend she saw me as. Was I like any other friend to her, or maybe special in
some way? The fact that she so rarely spoke of herself or other people made
it really difficult to judge.
Shimamura seemed like she didn't understand me well, but rest assured,
that feeling was mutual.
If I couldn't tell just by looking, my only option was to ask.
Shimamura. In what way do you like me?
Could I really just walk up to her and ask her that? What if she said that
she didn't like me? What would I do then?
As I copied what it said on the blackboard like a robot, my idle mind
filled with endless thoughts like those. Mostly regarding the distance between
me and Shimamura, which was excusable, considering there wasn't really
Even if I had tried paying attention to the third period maths lesson, the
subject matter was far beyond the comprehension of someone like me who
lacked the basics, and as such, the act of copying things down into my
notebook was just making me even more bored. Every now and then, I
quickly glanced over to Shimamura, sitting in the distance. She seemed
slightly tired too, judging from the way she idly gripped her pen.
Going to class meant having fewer opportunities to talk with Shimamura.
We obviously couldn't do it during the class, and even during the short breaks
between them, I found it difficult to walk over to her due to the distance
between us. Furthermore, Shimamura usually spent the lunch breaks with
Hino and Nagafuji.
Whenever those two were around, I ended up distancing myself. It wasn't
like I was afraid of them or anything; I just couldn't get used to the
atmosphere they brought with them. That whole "getting along with different
types of people and giving them a warm smile" business simply wasn't for
me. If that was the kind of commitment—taking other people's feelings into
consideration—socialising took, then sign me off.
Shimamura would never require that sort of reading the mood from me.
And yet, there was nothing holding us together, and we easily separated. It
was there that I sometimes, even if rarely, wished that she'd leave her other
friends and stay with me.
Now that I had wasted the lunch break, all that remained was the time
after school. Quite often, Shimamura left immediately by herself. She had
It kinda felt as if at her core, she was a good student. Following her lead, I
had ended up starting to do it too—studying at home.
I spent that day extremely self-conscious, likely due to that dream, and
found it impossible to approach her.
That was true of most of the days, us not meeting. Shimamura basically
never invited me to do something with her. Her asking me to come to class
with her had been an exception to that, which is why I had been so taken
aback.
I had never met Shimamura during a day off. When we hung around in
school, or even when we went somewhere from there, we were always
wearing our school uniforms, and I couldn't shake off the feeling that that's
the kind of friends we were.
As such, it was really difficult for me to say anything to her. It always felt
like I'd come off as sounding pushy.
She'd always accept people when they leaned against her, but would
never lean against anyone herself.
That was how I imagined Shimamura in my mind.
What exactly does "creative new Chinese cuisine" mean?
Don't ask me, I don't have a clue. And before you think about asking the
manager, she most likely doesn't either.
That sentence, inscribed on a sign outside of where I worked, could be
summed up in a single word: mysterious.
though from what I heard, it only seemed to be a thing in this region. The
managers and employees were all Taiwanese, and a lot of them didn't even
speak Japanese yet. As for the stores themselves, they were always painted
yellow and served cheap lunch, and the serving sizes, specifically for the
deep-fried stuff, were massive.
I worked in one of those restaurants. Why? Well, it seemed like I'd get to
do something productive with my time. It was better than just loitering
around, in my opinion.
I did kinda wonder what it said about me that I didn't have any plans on
Sundays and instead chose to work, but whatever.
The menus placed on the tables were reused from store to store, it
seemed, and all shared the same pictures of the individual dishes. Receiving
food that barely resembled what you had ordered was a daily occurrence, to
the point that getting what you wanted was actually by far the rarer outcome.
This chain also happened to sell manga books, but their volume numbers—
much like their contents—were all over the place. A cheap-looking dragon
decoration hung from the ceiling, giving the store a subtly exotic feel.
I was fine working there. What I wasn't fine with, however, was the
costume I was made to wear. Why did I alone have to work wearing a China
dress? The dress was light blue with embroidered flowers, and the long,
vertical slit completely exposed one of my legs. Now, you might have said
that the skirt I had to wear to school exposed more of my legs, and you
would've been right, but this was a different type of embarrassment. Maybe it
why none of the other female employees had to wear one, her only answer
had been "you're young". Yeah, you didn't need to be smart to figure that one
out.
Though I had been working here ever since the summer vacation and was
more or less used to it, I still often found myself getting embarrassed.
A single car had already been parked in the parking lot that faced the
building. There were still two whole minutes left until 5 o'clock, however,
and none of the employees were doing anything other than sitting around.
Was working precisely the right amount and not a second extra perhaps part
of their national character? I, too, stared at the white car through the door,
secretly hoping for a quiet day.
At the exact moment the clock struck five, one of my co-workers, an old
lady (obviously Taiwanese), exited the store. She removed the large "Closed"
sign hanging over the door, and turned on the lamp indicating that we were
open. Having seen this, the doors of the white car parked outside opened.
The sun had already begun to set, and it was a little dim outside. Fancy
inventions such as street lights were obviously unheard of around where we
lived, and as such, I couldn't tell much about the figures making their way
towards us, other than that they seemed vaguely human. The old lady
returned inside (she only spoke broken Japanese), and after her came in a
family of four. Barely even looking at who I was speaking to, I repeated the
same, routine greeting for what must have been the millionth time by now.
"Welcome i— Huh?"
The third person to enter, after a middle-aged man and woman, had been
Shimamura.
She quickly noticed me as well and, just like I had, opened her mouth in
shock.
Had I accidentally told her where I worked? I didn't think so. No, this was
most likely a pure coincidence. And yet, I couldn't help but be taken aback.
This really wasn't something I had been expecting to happen.
Shimamura was already staring at me, clearly curious about me being
there, as well as the dress I was wearing. I immediately hung my head.
"Oh. Ohh."
I could feel her eyes scanning me up and down. Had it been anyone other
than her doing it, I likely would've started yelling.
The woman looked over at Shimamura and spoke to her.
"Your friend?"
"Yep, from school", she explained shortly, speaking just slightly faster
than usual. A bit bluntly, which was explained by the fact that it was her
mother she was talking to.
Picking up on such a slight variation in her tone made me feel kinda
happy for some reason, just a little bit. I wonder why.
These two people with her were likely Shimamura's parents. Her dad was
slightly on the chubby side, and gave off a gentle aura. Her mom was thin
and had slender legs, but her shoulders were broad. Something about her told
me that she was well-disciplined.
her. This was Shimamura's little sister, the one we had talked about the other
day. Our eyes met as I glanced at her. She proceeded to stare at me all over,
likely curious about the China dress I was wearing.
"A China dress, huh? So, you work in this kind of place, Adachi?"
"...This way, please."
Not wanting to attract the attention of the other employees, I quickly
guided them to a table. It was a square table, with two seats on either side.
Shimamura's parents sat on the left side, leaving her and her little sister on the
right one. The aforementioned girl sat practically glued to her older sister,
and was already reaching for the menu. The two were on good terms, it
seemed.
Before bringing them water and taking their orders, I glanced at
Shimamura—still staring at me—and whispered.
"Do you see now why I said it was gonna be embarrassing?"
No matter how much I pulled, I simply couldn't hide my leg, peeking
through the slit.
"Come on, you don't need to feel embarrassed. I think it looks good on
you", she said back to me with a lively smile on her face, clearly wanting to
tease me. Though it was quite rare to see such an innocent expression on
Shimamura's face, it didn't exactly feel like I was being praised. It was more
like, she had just said it to see what would happen.
"So, your name is Adachi?"
The one speaking this time was Shimamura's mom. In the corner of my
"Yes, Adachi."
"Hmm, and you're her friend? Ah, it was so much easier before she
entered high school. Nowadays, she rarely brings her friends over, and I have
no idea who they are."
"Haa..."
"That's because you don't need to know, Mom. Stop asking her
questions."
Shimamura shook her hand in an attempt to interrupt her mom, clearly
annoyed. I could definitely understand her feelings.
"Is she in your class?"
"I told you, stop it!" Shimamura raised her voice. She was still shaking
her hand, and seemed even more irritated than before.
"What?" her mom laughed back, deciding not to pay attention to her
daughter's obvious dissatisfaction. This situation was one that my family too
was very familiar with, I felt. I was no stranger to self-consciousness fuelled
feuds with my parents, especially when I had still been in middle school.
Nevertheless, seeing Shimamura act all flustered in front of me helped me
calm down myself, just a little bit.
"So, why did you... Ummm..."
I wanted to ask her why she had come here, but had trouble getting the
words out. Thankfully, Shimamura seemed to understand what I was trying to
say, and answered me.
"Well, we saw an ad in the city magazine and started talking how we
"I see..."
Silently, I cursed the manager for ever putting out those ads. I was really
embarrassed, and could only assume that the feeling was mutual.
Though she usually let it hang straight, Shimamura's hair was tied in a
bun today. That slight change alone made her feel far more relaxed than
usual. Or perhaps, as she was sitting next to her little sister, was the vibe I
was sensing off her actually a sisterly one?
It went without saying, but Shimamura's little sister's hair wasn't dyed,
and varied greatly from that of her older sibling. It was black, most likely the
same colour Shimamura's would've been had she never dyed it. Wouldn't
have looked bad on her, I thought.
"Please call me when you are ready to order. Thank you."
First things first, I left the table. Though I might have been distracted by
her mom's comments and forgotten about it for a moment, the fact remained
that I was currently wearing a China dress. I simply couldn't bear showing off
such an unusual outfit to Shimamura for any longer.
Knowing Shimamura, I could rest assured that she wasn't going to start
spreading rumours or anything. The only problem was, she herself was the
person who I had least wanted to know. I walked as far away from her as I
could, backing all the way to the entrance of the store. One of the old ladies I
worked with was standing there. In broken Japanese, she asked me if she was
my friend, and I nodded slightly.
Yes. Shimamura and I were friends. A level of relationship that no one
Shimamura's little sister read through the menu her older sister was
holding open for her. Something soon caught her attention, and her eyes shot
wide open.
"This 'shark fin soup' is super expensive!" she exclaimed cheerfully.
"You're not having that", her father quickly stated. There was more truth
to his words than he had likely meant there to be; we didn't actually serve
shark fin soup. It was only on the list since—like previously mentioned—the
menus were reused across different restaurants.
Still, they sure looked like they got along, huh? That was all I could think
as I stared at Shimamura and her family. My relationship with my own was
far more basic, or perhaps 'lacking' was a better way to describe it. We
obviously lived in the same house as we were a family, but that really was the
only reason for it. It was rare for us to even speak to each other. In a way, I
felt jealous of Shimamura.
Don't get me wrong: I didn't want to stand here staring at them forever.
Rather, I wanted them to leave as soon as possible. And if not that, then I
wanted to leave myself. For what must've been the thousandth time, I yanked
the hem of the dress. I wished that I had at least been allowed to wear normal
clothes like the other people. Oh no, Shimamura just looked at me. I
instinctively turned my eyes away.
Knowing Shimamura, she likely thought that my embarrassment was
solely due to being from the same school as her. In truth, however, there was
a whole other reason for it: seeing her face brought the dream I had two days
I had already repeated this to myself a countless number of times, but just
to restate, that dream wasn't born from feelings of guilt or anything like that. I
had simply felt anxious about the distance between us, and those worries had
manifested themselves in the form of a dream. That was all there was to it.
And yet, I couldn't bring myself to look at her and return her gaze.
Not when I was caught this off-guard.
As long as I thought about it positively, as us sharing a secret, I felt like I
could find it in myself to allow the existence of these sorts of moments. The
China dress was just too much, though. I hated how it chafed my skin.
"Adachi!"
A moment later, Shimamura's mom called my name and gestured for me
to come to their table. Had they decided what they were going to order?
"Hey, go", the worker said in broken Japanese as she tapped my shoulder,
which, compared to my feet, felt relatively light.
My eyes shut, I walked towards them with heavy steps.
What reason did I even have to feel embarrassed?
The next day, I sat on the second floor of the gym. Needless to say, there
weren't any lessons taking place here.
Simply put, I was skipping class. Following Shimamura's invitation, I had
gone to class like a good student for around a week, so in a way, this was my
day off. I sat there with my back against the wall, spacing out.
My eyes weren't focused on the same spot, and everything around me
that certainly wasn't the case for me; I was strangely addicted to the relaxing
sensation it gave me. Sitting motionlessly, my mind slowly faded away. I
forgot all about breathing and blinking and the like, and my body started
feeling light.
Second period was already under way, judging from the sounds of balls
bouncing on the floor below. I rubbed my eyes and, making sure to stick
close to the wall, peeked down. I could see some boys chasing after a
basketball. The ones not quite so interested sat along the wall, chatting about
something. Had I been a boy, that was where I likely would've found myself.
Same went for Shimamura, of course. After a few moments, I pulled my head
away, knowing well what fuss it would raise if anyone saw me.
I shoved my hand into the bag sitting next to me. I grabbed my phone, but
no one had called me, and I didn't have any messages either. After fiddling
with it for a moment, I put it back into my bag. I was the kind of person
whose phone rarely rang.
Regardless, I was quick to pull it out whenever I found myself bored,
which was likely what earned me all those disapproving looks from people
born before such technologies were invented.
With the back of my head resting against the wall, I let out a small sigh.
It wasn't like anything bad had happened. If anything, you could've said
that I was in a festive mood of sorts after yesterday's events. My body was
light, as if embraced by something fluffy from all around. As such, I hadn't
really felt like sitting idly in the classroom. Thinking about it, that might have
The atmosphere of the second floor of the gym felt really thick, now that I
breathed it in for the first time in a week. Every breath caused my body to
become heavier, making it ever harder for me to leave this place. The taste of
laziness spread, and I felt like I was choking on it.
Was this how smokers felt when lighting a cigarette after a failed attempt
to quit? Hard to say; I had never smoked.
The sound of my shoes rubbing against the floor filled the slightly hot and
stuffy area. The sound swallowed my body, and my eyelids started to feel
heavy.
As the faint drowsiness swayed my head, my mouth suddenly moved,
forming words.
"...Who am I kidding?"
Though admittedly quite a vague one, there was a reason for me to be
here.
That was, if I didn't show up to class, Shimamura might notice and come
here to take a look. It was what pouting children did: behaving weirdly or
sitting quietly somewhere people wouldn't find them, all the while secretly
hoping that someone would worry about them. I had long since admitted that
there was a side like that to me.
In the back of my mind, I had also had a faint suspicion that Shimamura
might have been here.
Obviously, she hadn't been.
Most likely, it was only me who saw yesterday as anything special.
It was when mine started rising and hers stayed the same that I grew worried
about myself. Was everything really okay with me?
The fact that Shimamura had become the standard for my actions
concerned me.
With my eyes hidden behind my hands, I sighed: so much of this
resembled unrequited love.
The sound of footsteps coming up the stairs brought me back to reality.
Some time had passed, and by now, the lunch break must have already begun
for those outside of my hiding place.
I pushed out all of the languid air from my lungs and sat back down. A
part of me very much wanted to check the entrance, and I had to force myself
not to look. How many stairs did the staircase have again, I wondered. Just
then...
"Adachi."
My ears twitched. I pulled back my head, and cautiously looked up to the
speaker. It was Shimamura. Trying my best to not let my astonishment show,
I replied to her, all the while feeling both happy and guilty that she had come
here just like I had hoped.
"What?"
"Wanna come to the cafeteria with me? We never go there."
Shimamura was acting like her usual self. The events of yesterday didn't
seem to have affected her in any way. She had still come here, though, which
"Sure, I don't mind."
I grabbed my bag and pushed myself up. After dusting off my skirt, I
turned to face her.
There she was, the usual Shimamura. Not wearing casual clothes, her hair
not tied.
She waited for me to fix up my uniform, after which we exited the gym.
While walking, I realised that I hadn't said good morning. That was pretty
common, though. We rarely greeted each other in any way when we met.
Even our parting words were pretty half-assed most of the time.
"And I thought you had finally started coming to class like a good
student", Shimamura suddenly stated as we walked down the stairs. The tone
of her voice sounded completely different to how it was usually.
"Are you imitating someone?"
"Yeah, our teacher. How was I supposed to know where you were?" she
shrugged her shoulders. The teacher had asked Shimamura where I was?
In other words, she thought that we were friends.
Close enough for her to ask Shimamura first.
Hmph...
"You really found it that funny? I thought it was a pretty bad imitation",
she looked at me puzzled, her eyes wide.
"Huh? What do you mean?" I asked back, confused by what exactly she
had meant.
"That", Shimamura stated, pointing at my face.
pretty excited back there. Even disregarding the reason why, this alone was
enough to make me blush fiercely.
"There's nothing to be ashamed of."
"Easier said than done."
Shimamura seemed to be under the impression that the act of laughing
itself was the source of my embarrassment.
She really was clueless, huh? Not that I was complaining, of course; the
situation would've been way worse had she known.
Still rubbing my cheeks, I walked behind Shimamura as we headed
towards the cafeteria, the entrance of which was located outside of the school
building.
To be perfectly honest, this was the first time I had ever used the
cafeteria. It had always seemed to me like a hang-out place for second and
third-year students, one that a first-year student such as myself wasn't exactly
welcome in. Also, and more importantly, I wasn't orderly enough to get lunch
daily.
In the past, I had done some observing while passing by to make sure that
I wouldn't panic and get all flustered when it came time for me to order, and
from what I could gather, the cafeteria looked to be based on meal tickets.
Next to the entrance, there was a machine, and before it, a line of people
which we joined. There was also another queue next to us, and as I peeked at
its source, I saw a canteen.
Was this where Shimamura always came to buy things? Hard to say; I
sold not only mineral water but yellow soda as well, though according to the
red warning light, the latter wasn't available at the moment.
We didn't say anything to each other while in the queue. It was as if we
were holding our breath, overpowered by the noisiness of the other students
around us. I did feel like I should say something, anything, but nothing came
to mind. I also felt like our eyes were going to meet eventually if I kept
staring at her slender neck and had no choice but to look away.
It was bright outside, and the windows sparkled with the sun's light.
There were some clouds too, dark in the middle and bright around the edges,
and through the rifts between them, peeked the bright blue sky. Behind me, I
heard lively chatter, piercing through my body, and smelled the faint scent of
food.
The scenery was pretty dull, honestly, but staring at it was the best and
only way of killing time I had while we waited.
After what felt like an eternity, it finally came our turn to buy meal
tickets. Shimamura, having prepared the exact sum of coins beforehand, went
ahead and picked the daily special, a Chinese rice bowl. Hadn't she also
eaten Chinese food yesterday? I wondered as I chose the same one. We
walked inside, exchanged our tickets for food at the counter in the middle,
and filled our cups with water from the supply next to it. All that we needed
to do now was look for seats. That turned out to be easier said than done;
none of the long, blue tables were empty.
After walking around for a bit, we eventually found a table with free
was lukewarm, and left a faintly rustic taste on my tongue.
It tasted like tap-water. I far preferred mineral water over this crap.
I put the cup down and picked up the chopsticks. As I did, I could feel a
pair of eyes staring at me from the opposite side of the table.
"Hehe", Shimamura giggled as I lifted my head to look at her.
"What?" I asked, my hand stopped in mid-air.
"I was just thinking about how cute you were yesterday."
Cute. Out of all the words in the world, that one made me blush the
hardest.
When you added on her innocent grin, exposing her rarely-seen teeth, it
become utterly impossible for me to look her in the eyes.
"You were cute too, Shimamura", I retorted, though it barely counted as
one.
"Huh? Really? I was dressed like normal, though..."
Yes, that's what I meant: you were always cute. Shimamura didn't seem to
have interpreted it that way, however, and simply laughed off my remark as a
joke of sorts. For some unknown reason, she considered me to be the prettier
one out of us two. I don't think anyone would disagree with me if I said that
was a grand misunderstanding.
Shimamura was way cuter compared to me. Of course, as saying that to
her face would've made the mood all weird, I decided to let the topic slide. I
sat there silently, staring at my food and moving the chopsticks.
"Maybe I should come eat there again?"
serious. If Shimamura's family started visiting the restaurant regularly, I'd
have to find a new job.
"I was just joking. I'm not really a fan of going with my family either."
"Figured. It's kinda embarrassing to have your folks looking, huh?"
"You bet it is. Now, let's eat."
Shimamura pressed her palms together, and I did the same. I rarely did
this before eating these days. I mostly ate by myself, and had kinda just
forgotten.
We then began eating, and the conversation once again paused. Though
Shimamura had spent the entirety of her meal at the restaurant engaging in
friendly chatter with her family, it didn't seem like a similar atmosphere was
going to be born between us. There really was something special about
family, huh?
I did want our relationship to become special too, one day.
Like, best friends. Or lovers? No, not lovers. Maybe? Definitely not.
Eating restlessly, like licking the chopsticks, thoughts like those filled my
head.
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